October Funnies

(Talking about the hyena dogs at the zoo)
Courtney- "Sometimes when the Melina dogs bark, it sounds like they're laughing!"

Courtney- "Mommy is pretty, Oma is pretty, Jazzy is pretty, Melina is pretty, but not Brigham. He's just a boy."

(Me nagging her to go potty before she has an accident)
Courtney- (exasperated, rolls eyes) "Jeez, Mom, you're a nightmare!"

(Courtney kept getting out of bed, being naughty, grabs a witch's broom)
Jeremy- "Courtney, get in bed or I'm going to beat you with whatever is in your hand!"
Courtney- (throws down the witch's broom) "I'm going upstairs to bed where it's safe!!"
(*side note, Jeremy was totally kidding!)

(driving home from being in the mountains)
Courtney- "Daddy, you're an antelope, and I'm a monkey."
Jeremy- "What is Mommy?"
Courtney- (whispers) "A hippopotamus."

(after hearing a bang in the kitchen)
Courtney- "What in tarnations was that??"
Me- (laughing) "What did you just say?"
Courtney- (dead serious) "I SAID, what in TARNATIONS was that?!"

(Courtney and I in backyard on lawn chair relaxing, Ruger slobbering and licking on us)
Courtney- "Boogie, get your slimey self away from me!"

(Me squeezing Courtney super tight)
Me- "I love you, I love you, I love you!"
Courtney- "Oh Mom, you just squeezed out a little pee!"

(eating dinner, Courtney spits out her first bite)
Courtney- "Mom, this is NOT the best you ever made!"

(Courtney in bathtub)
Courtney- "Look how I swim like a duck."
Me- "Wow, where did you learn that?"
Courtney- "Oh, well, my teacher just taught it to me."
Me- "Your teacher? From where?"
Courtney- "From school."
Me- (completely baffled) "When do you go to school?"
Courtney- "Tuesdays and Thursdays at 2:00"
Me- "Oh... and what's your teacher's name?"
Courtney- "Miss Emily"
Me- "Really... well how do you get there? I've never taken you to school before!"
Courtney- "Oh, well, I just get on my bike and ride really fast on the roads."
Me- "All by yourself?"
Courtney- "Boogie comes with me."
(continues to tell me all about everything the fictional "miss emily" has taught her.)

(In tub, examining feet)
Courtney- "Huh... I have grandma feet."

(still in tub, holding rubber ducky under water and squeezing, causing bubbles to rise, and laughing)
Me- "What was that?!"
Courtney- "Oh, It's just my ducky's toots!"

Courtney- "Someday I wish I could be big like you."
Me- "Someday you will be, and then you'll be a mommy."
Courtney- "Yah!"
Me- "And what will I be?"
Courtney- "A freakin' old hippopotamus!"